Series: Juice Rap News

The year we’ve all been waiting for – 2012AD (or 13.0.0.0.0, if you ask a Mayan) – is finally here. What will happen? Will we see the poles shift or a paradigm shift? Will a rogue Sumerian planet smash into our solar system, plunging us into serfdom under the iron fist of a race of gold-hungry aliens? Or are the aliens already here? Or are all these merely humanity’s collective projections of itself as it careens towards an ever-accelerating super-connected cyber-reality – whatever that means… One thing’s sure, if 2011 was a prelude of things to come, 2012 is going to be one hell of a year. Now that it has arrived, are we ready? Join your host Robert Foster and his guests, Terrence Moonseed and General Baxter, as they conduct an in-depth rap analysis into the future, and humanity’s place in it. Happy New YERA!

Juice Rap News: written by Giordano Nanni; lyrics and performance by Hugo Farrant. Created by Farrant & Nanni in a back-yard studio in suburban Melbourne.

“The economy” threatens to annihilate our stock-piles of imaginary, inflated wealth, spawning a battle of epic proportions as insurgent grassroots forces move in to #OccupywallStreet and coalitions of indignados hold their ground in Athens, Madrid and Tel Aviv; facing up to the riotgear, batons and tazers that stand between them and a more equal redistribution of the proverbial pie. …But enough action and excitement! It’s time for some heroic armchair philosophy: Join your affable host, Robert Foster as he attempts to shine some light on this mysterious creature, “the economy”. Is this the failure of capitalism that we are witnessing, or its triumph? Is it the end of the end of history, or yet another crazy chapter in the whimsical journey of the human experiment?

Postscript: For the occasion, we’ve pulled out the big guns: admittedly it was a tough choice deciding who to interview: we could’ve had Alan Greenspan on the show, or the Emperor himself, Milton Friedman; the first lady, Christine Lagarde; or financial buffs like Gerald Celente, Peter Schiff and Donald Trump. But to get the freshest juice we knew we had to go further – much further. Rap News 9 features two VIP Internet grandees who have uploaded gigabytes of juice via the one remaining free frequency to feed a discerning and ravenous audience, thirsty for answers. Whilst these two fine folk agree with each other on many things, fortunately, there’s no shortage of issues to rap-battle about. Well, time’s short – so let the rhyme-rodeo begin as we blast off on a rollercoaster odyssey. It’s the stupid Economy, in all its gory glory.

Juice Rap News: written by Giordano Nanni; lyrics and performance by Hugo Farrant. Created by Farrant & Nanni in a back-yard studio in suburban Melbourne.

A Rap News summary of the last week’s remarkable events. The decade which opened with a ferocious attack upon the United States of America on September 11, 2001, closes with the announcement of the death of its greatest and most conveniently disney-like villain, Osama Bin Laden. In a decade which has been dominated by the Empire Strikes Back, our affable and dextrous host Robert Foster invites us to scrutinise the events shrouding the killing of this twentyfirst-century Goldstein. Joining him in this May retrospective are Rap News regulars, General Baxter, the Pentagon’s most effusive spokesperson, attempting uncharacteristically to stay ‘on message’, and his counterpart from the world of alternative academia, the conspiracy industry’s favourite son, Terrence Moonseed. What actually happened in Abbotabad? Do the public have a right to see evidence of this event? What is Terrence wearing on his head? Was justice really served? What next? History is happening.

Juice Rap News: written by Giordano Nanni; lyrics and performance by Hugo Farrant. Created by Farrant & Nanni in a back-yard studio in suburban Melbourne.

Before there was #OccupyWallStreet there was #OccupyWisconsin. It’s 2011 and amid a flurry of political leaks and revelations, revolutions have rolled across North Africa and The Middle East. Join your host Robert Foster for long overdue analysis of these events, asking the question that’s on everyone’s lips — where will revolution spark next? How will the world treat the latest courageous country to throw off the yoke of oppression? Is any cow sacred in this time of massive upheaval? Can there be any doubt that History Is Happening?

Juice Rap News: co-written by Giordano Nanni & Hugo Farrant. Created by Farrant & Nanni in a back-yard studio in suburban Melbourne.

Cablegate has burst open. With a steady trickle of Diplomatic communiques leaking out every single day, the Book of Revelations is expanding dramatically. In all the hubbub, the global community is forced to ask questions of its leaders. Will the world ever be the same again? Join your affable host Robert Foster, as he executes a rhyme inquisition on some of the key players in the Wiki-saga. It’s diplomatic Rhym-aggedon…

Juice Rap News: written by Giordano Nanni; lyrics and performance by Hugo Farrant. Created by Farrant & Nanni in a back-yard studio in suburban Melbourne.

Who let the Logs out!? Wikileaks drops 400,000 classified documents shedding new light on the Iraq war—the biggest leak of classified military documents in history—sending shockwaves across the Fourth Estate. Rap News marks the occasion by inviting into the studio the former US Secretary of Offense, Donald Rumsfeld. But what starts out as a conventional Rap News interview soon descends into mayhem as the live feed is hijacked by News World Order, eager to spin the record like a disc jockey on crack. Enter Bill O’Really, the champion of Fair & Balanced journalism, dragging us screaming into the No Spine Zone. Only divine intervention can save us now, from a fate worse than death. But beware of imitators; not all is what it seems to be! Join us for a rollercoaster episode of Rap News, featuring a very very special guest appearance.

We resume our lyrical forays into the world of rhyme and reason, exploring the importance of the Internets. Robert Foster casts a critical rhyme over Senator Joe (Lie)berman’s proposed bill to shut down the world-wide-web in case of [quotation mark] an emergency [/quotation mark].

But – most importantly – we discuss something else which has been leaking even more profusely than a BP oil well. An organisation of ultra-inspiring infectively-courageous cybernauts – aka Wikileaks – has been taking on the Fistagon and giving that slumbering Fourth Estate a much-needed kick in the arse, reminding us how important the internet is as a tool for open information and for holding corrupt government to account.

What is Wikileaks? Who is Julian Assange? And why is it so important that we know what’s happening right now? Find out with your charming host, Robert Foster.

Al Gore finally accepts Lord Monckton’s challenge to a highly uncivilized debate over the issue of anthropogenic climate change, as we count down to the Copenhagen Climate Conference – aka COP15 – in a special extended edition of ~RapNews, .

Back by popular demand, Robert Foster turns his attention to the soaring Orwellian rhetoric hailing from Oslo, where Barack Obama is currently receiving the prestigious Nobel War-is-Peace prize.

This second episode of Rap News covers the fallout from the now infamous NASA Moon Bomb on October 9th, the very same day on which the Nobel Committee awarded US President Barack Obama the 2009 ‘War is Peace’ Prize. Is it justified? Is it premature or plain immature? And what will the Moon say?! Was this a prize for peace-making or for making war look like peace, something Bush was not able to do? And why do we even care what these Norwegian guys do. All this, and more, in this latest report with Robert Foster on JuiceMedia’s Rap News.

In a galaxy far far away… on October 9th, 2009, the Earth carried out its first attack on a neighbouring celestial body by bombing its trusty moon with a missile/rocket/thing, in the name of SCIENCE! Is this a worthy attempt to aid humanity with its energy crisis; or the hallmarks of an aggressive space-faring civilisation in the making? (or an NWO/NASA/Roswell/Bildeberg/Illuminati conspiracy?)